Cock-a-doodle-ow!

Oh my how quickly things change in fantasy basketball from week to week, day to day, hour to hour, minute to, well, you get the idea. Last night the Rooster, Danilo Gallinari broke his left thumb and is basically gone for the season, he’s toast, peoples. Let’s talk about the fantasy impact, shall we? I mean that’s why you come here I assume, for fantasy basketball insight and cheap thrills. If you want to also listen to a cool song then you can check out the About page and watch Snow Patrol’s Run video. Love that song but let’s focus for a second on fantasy hoops. Wilson Chandler is your obvious new huckleberry. Last night it was like he never left as he dropped 13/4/2 with a block, 2 steals and a three in 28 minutes of burn. Amigos and amiga, there aren’t many guys who are capable of averaging more than a three, block and a steal per. Rudy Gay comes to mind and Wilson Chandler is this close to doing that, I’m holding my fingers really close together in case you can’t see me which I know you can’t. Count on him for around 14/5/2 with 1.5 3pm, 1 bpg and close to a steal per. Not bad says you! Says me too! Here’s what else I saw in fantasy basketball last night:

Kenneth Faried – 9/5/1 in 25 minutes. Just when you think you might have to lose him because of the Wilson Chandler signing, you get pulled back in! Imagine Al Pacino saying it, it’s much more affective. I don’t know if Al plays fantasy basketball. Anyway, I could see a Faried/JaVale McGee front court getting tons of run together. Sort of like Abbott and Costello but not really like that at all. If Kenny is out there go ahead and give him a whirl in your standard league. May I call you Kenny, Kenneth?

Arron Afflalo – 24/3/2 with 2 threes and a steal in 35 minutes. Here’s another direct beneficiary of the Gallo injury. The main thing is getting the burn and he’ll continue to see the 33ish he’s been averaging on the season. I had him as a definite downgrade with Chandler signing but that not the case no mo’. I don’t know if Mr. T plays fantasy basketball but I can’t imagine he would be any good at it and forget about trying to say no to Mr. T if he makes you a trade offer. You really going to say no to Mr. T? Sorry, Mr. T but I don’t want to deal Dwyane Wade for Jeremy Lin. Mr. T: Oh, yes, you will. Say it in Mr. T’s voice, it works better.

Rudy Fernandez/Corey Brewer – Go ahead and keep an eye on these two deep league knuckleheads. I meant to say deeeep. Maybe they could help, maybe not. I’m very com si com sa on the whole thing. That’s an homage to Gallo, which means rooster in Italian. Also an homage to my mother who is full blooded Italian but she just crazy. I love her anyway.

Rodrigue Beaubois – 14/3/6 with a steal and 2 threes in 36 minutes. Shawn Marion sat this one out so Roddy got some nice extra burn last night. Continue to stream him while The Matrix is sidelined. Question for you: If you suck compared to how you played in your prime, are you still allowed to keep the cool nickname?

Evan Turner – 6/3/0 on 3-11 FG in 27 minutes. He’s come back to earth his past two games but here’s what I told you back on March 8: The not so awesome news is that we must temper our fantasy expectations for young Evan. Don´t forget last night Thaddeus Young sat out due to illness. I´m not saying Thaddeus is the bee´s knees or anything like that, hell, he´s not even the bee´s knee but he is a minute eater and, undoubtedly, will cut into Turner´s touches. Secondly, Evan hoisted 19 shots last night and connected on 11 of them. In case your math skills are as dubious as mine, my handy dandy calculator says he shot .578 last night. Um, he´s at .418 FG on the season and .423 FG for his young career. Lastly, it´s not like Jodie Meeks left the country or went MIA or anything like that; he still lurks, he has a girl´s name but he still lurks. Add it all up and you´ve got a solid add in standard leagues but let´s not go crazy. Go ahead and grab him quick, quick but I gots to also keep it realz for y´all. That´s what I does, I keeps it realz, you feel me? Just don´t touch me. I’m still digging me some Evan but it’s all good, he wasn’t going to be dropping 20/10 lines forever, man. Keep riding him baby.

Reggie Williams – 13/6/2 with a three in Corey Maggette’s stead. Corey got back (pain)! I loved that headline. Stream Reggie and Kemba Walker while Corey is out but looks likely Mags is back on Thursday. Damn, I just stole Dave Magadan’s nickname. Remember him? The baseball card got it wrong.

Zaza Pachulia – 16/13/0 with 3 steals in 39 minutes. Over his last 5 he’s averaging 10.6 ppg/11.6 rpg/1.4 spg. He’s not blocking but he should be owned in more than 31% of Yahoo! leagues. Come on, white man can’t get no respek! Or respect if you’re not into Ali G. Who doesn’t like Ali G?

Kirk Hinrich – 9/2/3 in 37 minutes. Ahem, as I was saying yesterday

Michael Pietrus – 9/6/0 with a steal, block and 2 threes in 29 minutes. I want to make this perfectly clear, I am not a fan of Michael’s basketball skills but I will have to ignore that for now and focus on the minutes for a second. After talking with my Magic 8 Ball, he is forcing me to give a begrudging luke-warm recommendation in deep leagues of 16+ teams or more. If he doesn’t get minutes blame it on my Magic 8 Ball, I just can’t stand to hear him whine about Pietrus this, Pietrus that anymore so I’m giving in.

Tristan Thompson – 27/12/1 with a block on 12-16 FG in 37 minutes. Usually monster games like this are the product of ridiculous FG accuracy, this time Tristan connected from the field at a .750 clip. Just gots to keep it realz for y’all in case you think the guy who’s been aborting 53% of his shot up to last night will keep it up. Anyway, ride him like a pony until Anderson Varejao returns. I prefer ponies over horses, they are so much cuter.

Anthony Parker – 4/3/5 with a steal in 32 minutes. One word for you: Ugh. Deeep league consideration only. While you’re at it go ahead and grab Jared Jeffries too.

Carlos Boozer – 24/13/2 with 4 steals on 12-18 FG. Ok, ok, I usually kill Carlos as being an overrated fantasy asset which he is but I gots to give the man some props for taking it to Dwight Howard last night. He went up against the fire eating dragon and made marshmallows! Funny I always thought it was marshmellows. Thank you spell checker, you just changed my life!

Nikola Pekovic – 6/2/1 with a steal and a block in 9 minutes. The man has two bad ankles. You ever try to walk with two bad ankles let alone jump up and down on something they call hardwood? I’d bench him until further notice. He’ll need some rest. I hope you feel better soon Nik. I care. Stream Derrick Williams in the meantime. I loves me some DW.

J.J. Hickson – Signed with Golden State just so he can disappoint his fantasy owners for the second time in a season. Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me once shame on me. Or something like that. Go ahead and take a whirl in deep leagues.

Jeremy Lin – Did not play last night. Jeremy Lin can leave a message before the beep.

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2 Comments

  1. Fool me … you can’t get fooled again! Btw what’s your thoughts on RJeff? Seems to have found a new lease of life & is demanding the ball – any chance he’ll turn the clock back?

  2. @Andrew RJeff similar value as in SA. Not sure he’ll get the minutes in the long run but new guy will get minutes for now to see what they have and how he fits in.

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