Last night Glen Davis dropped 18 and 9 with his typical poor FG (6-18) but then something funny happened on the way to the final buzzer, he got hurt! He was screaming in pain like a, um, baby. Anyway, who to grab, who to grab just in case. Well, let’s see, there’s Gustavo Ayon. Meh, not feeling mucho amor for Gustavo right now so just monitor him. Then there’s Josh McRoberts who I’m feeling a bit blah about, I try to avoid things starting with Mc these days, you know with my cholesterol and all. Oh, then there’s what’s his face, Andrew Nicholson! Yes, yes, Andrew Nicholson, ding ding ding, that’s my Huckleberry who (whom!) I’m grabbing everywhere today just in case. Go ahead, don’t be shy, you can always lose him quick quick if Glen is ok. The early bird gets the worm! But you knew that already. Here’s what else I saw in fantasy basketball last night:
Greg Monroe – 35/10/2 with 2 steals. Greg Monroe is terrible, he stinks. I hope you bought him!
Alan Anderson – 16/3/1 with 2 steals and 3 threes. He really needs to be owned in all standard leagues right now. I don’t know what his current ownership percentage in Yahoo! is at the moment because I’m too lazy to look. I’ve got the lazies!
Terrence Ross – 9/0/1 with a three in 11 minutes. The potential is there but not the minutes so I kick potential to the curb … for now anyway.
J.R. Smith – 19/5/3 with a three in 37 minutes. I’m still feeling J.R. is a sell high. It’ll take cajones to move him because he’s been so good but just close your eyes and imagine Amare Stoudemire back. Then imagine Iman Shumpert back. Now imagine Jason Kidd hitting on a hot girl in the front row. He’s allowed, he got divorced!
Kevin Seraphin – 6/2/2 with 2 blocks in 23 minutes. As long as Nene Hilario is healthy, Kevin can be lost for a hot free agent. He’ll have his moments again (I think!) but no sense in waiting around for them if you can get help now for your team. If/when Nene gets hurt again though, be ready to pounce! Like a gato! Espanol!
Nene Hilario – 25/2/2 with a block in 25 minutes. Oh, hi, Nene, we were just talking about you. Don’t worry, it was nothing bad, we were just talking about your fragile health. We really don’t want you to get hurt again so Kevin Seraphin can get some run, really we don’t. Honest. Fingers crossed.
Gordon Hayward – 8/2/1 with a steal and 5 tovs in 13 minutes. By my elementary math skills, Gordon turned the ball over once every 2.6 minutes. Or in other words, every time he touched the ball! Just hold for now, hopefully this was the bottom, I’m guessing it was. I’m hoping it was!
Tyler Zeller – I again ask you to close your eyes and imagine a world in Cleveland where Anderson Varejao has been traded. Now imagine Tyler Zeller playing 36 minutes and dropping 20/3/2 with a steal. Reality? Mirage? Dreamy! He’s a must stream if Anderson is to miss more time.
C.J. Miles – 3/4/2 with a 3 in 17 minutes. Here’s what I told you yesterday: C.J. Miles – 13/4/1 with 4 threes in 30 minutes. Surprisingly still getting some run even after the return of Dion. I’ve been down the C.J. road before, he’s up and he’s down, he’s hot and he’s cold, he’s in and he’s out. Sing it, it sounds better. I think he’s kind of on his way out. Let’s see. That didn’t take long! By the way, it’s not me who makes all these predictions, it’s my Magic 8 Ball who moonlights as a crystal ball in Manhattan on weekends. He knows everything!
Kevin Martin – 6/2/0 with a steal in 26 minutes. Rest assured if Kevin has an off shooting night, you’re not getting any peripheral stats to supplement. You’re getting ugatz! I’d buy though if his owner isn’t happy.
Evan Turner – Turned his ankle but promises to be back Friday. Please come back fast Evan, you fantasy stud, you. I love you. >>>>>>>>>> gay.
Dorell Wright – 20/6/6 with 3 threes in 40 minutes. Dorell got extremely hot as Philly lost by 22 and Evan Turner went down for the count. Coincidence? 2+2=4. It’s that obvious!
Marcus Morris – 14/5/5 with a block in 31 minutes. Marcus has played very well in Patrick Patterson’s absence and my concern is this: He may have earned enough minutes to hurt Patterson when he comes back. Monitor this. Time splits suck, y’all!
Gerald Henderson – 4/4/3 with a block in 20 minutes. Burp. I don’t think he’s the fantasy stud that other fantasy, um, experts are making him out to be but you already knew that. That said, he’s useful, definitely useful, definitely useful, said Rain Main.
Michael Kidd-Gilchrist – 25/12/4 with 3 steals. The last time I pimped MKG was back in November then he promptly embarrassed me for about a month so I’m not going to say anything here. Nope, not gonna do it. Sssshh. hecman whispers. Let’s hope he can keep it up.
Shannon Brown – 26/4/2 with a steal, block and 5 threes in 36 minutes. Are my eyes deceiving me? Is it possible Alvin Gentry has finally settled on a rotation? Will Batman and Robin escape the evil clutches of the Joker and his henchmen? Tune in tomorrow, same Bat time, same Bat channel! Oops, nevermind, I got caught up in my childhood. Shannon, Jared Dudley, Luis Scola, Marcin Gortat and Goran Dragic. Congrats to you if you currently own any of these guys. If you own anyone else on the Suns, sympathies are in order.
Rudy Gay – 13/8/5 with 2 steals and a three. Oh, hey, a Rudy Gay blurb over at hecmanhoops. Damn, that’s awesome, I own Rudy Gay and I’ve never seen hecman blurb about him. It’s about time! Wait, why is there no fantasy information in this blurb? I want fantasy information, damn it! Thanks for asking, imaginary friend. Well, I’m blurbing about Rudy today to explain why I don’t blurb about most Grizzlies. They don’t have a psychotic coach and they are a stable fantasy team, what you see every night is pretty much what you’re always going to get. That’s why! We straight, Skippy? That’s your new name, unless you’re a girl, then substitute Skippy with Skippette.
Luc Richard Mbah a Moute – 4/4/0 in 22 minutes. Here’s what I told you just yesterday: Luc Richard Mbah a Moute – 10/10/2 with 2 steals and a block in 34 minutes. He’s Scott Skiles’ flavor of the day, tomorrow he’ll probably be all melted. Damn, now I have ice cream dripping all over my hands. Good thing I brought along a napkin. I was ready!
Monta Ellis – 4/2/2 with 2 steals and a block on 1-14 FG. Monta just couldn’t help himself I guess. I’m open. Brick. Give me the rock, Jennings, hurry. Clank. I’m due to hit one. Airball. Buy low if you want to try.
Jarrett Jack – 28/7/3 with 3 threes. Mark Jackson couldn’t just give Jarrett the type of run he’s been getting lately back in November before everyone dropped his ass? We all knew he was the guy who should have been playing all along after Brandon Rush went down for the count but nooooooooo. Now he’s on the other guy’s team. Drats!
Marcus Thornton – 19/3/0 with a steal and 5 threes. I was reading a large fantasy website this morning and they advised to pick up Marcus Thornton after his explosion last night. Um, maybe it’s just me but shouldn’t they have advised that before last night?