I’m feeling like Kobe Bryant today, uninspired! Last night Kobe, who is averaging 20.7 FGA per game attempted only 8 shots and aborted 7 of them. That means he missed 7 of 8 in case you’re trying to do the math. Reverse psychology! Not really. Anyway, while Kobe was busy day dreaming about Jason Kidd’s ex-wife, Antawn Jamison stepped up with 19/10/1 and 2 threes in 33 minutes. Can Antawn keep this up? Meh, naw, but with Earl Clark hurting and Pau Gasol in Spain for the next 6 weeks (or longer!), I’d stream Antawn on Thursday night without hesitation. Oh, and as for Kobe, trade his ass, he’s terrible! Here’s what else I saw in fantasy basketball last night:
Corey Brewer – 9/0/1 with a three in 28 minutes. I saw Danilo Gallinari, Wilson Chandler and Andre Iguodala were all sidelined for last night’s game so I practically ran over my wife getting to the computer to add a nice cheap Corey Brewer onto my Daily Fantasy Basketball teams. Burp. Hey, speaking of daily fantasy basketball, play me for free over at DraftDay and if you beat me you will win $5 no strings attached. Go ahead and give it a shot, honestly, it’s a lot of fun. I’m addicted. Anyway, stream Corey while those other boys miss time.
Anthony Randolph – 16/7/2 with 3 steals and 2 blocks. He’s really, really, really not that good.
Andre Miller – 12/6/5 with a steal and a three. Hey, hecman, damn fool, you should have played me instead of Corey Brewer!, said Andre. Sigh.
JaVale McGee – 2/1/0 in 5 minutes. Here’s the deal, peeps, if you don’t need his blocks then launch already. It’s almost Easter! Hope you know what I’m sayin’ up in here.
Jonas Valanciunas – 8/8/2 with 2 blocks in 32 minutes. Oh, yeaaaaaaaaaaah, uh, uh, JV in da howse! Rap it, it’s fun! Go get him if you haven’t yet boys and girls.
Andrea Bargnani – 4/1/0 in 18 minutes. Are you Bargnani owners having fun yet? In shallow leagues I don’t think I’d have a problem dropping him for a hot free agent. Or try to trade him in an odd man deal or something. If that’s even possible. As if!
J.J. Hickson – 5/0/0 with a steal in 13 minutes. It looks like the All Star Break couldn’t come at a more perfect time for J.J. owners. Phew! Carry on. By the way, there is no truth to the rumor that Portland will only play 4 players if J.J. is to miss tonight’s game. Keep an eye on Meyers Leonard if it happens.
Nicolas Batum – 5/2/4 with 2 blocks and a three in 38 minutes. That makes 3 out of 5 duds lately so if his owner is worried about his wrist then look him up. Doesn’t hurt to try anyway!
Jason Thompson – 15/6/0 with a steal in 28 minutes. After his cold spell several weeks ago he was dropped in a 14 team league I’m in and I scooped him up for his upside. If he’s out there for some reason in your standard or deep league you should do the same! He’s useful, definitely useful, definitely useful, said Rain Man.
Tony Allen – 19/8/3 with 2 steals, a block and a three in 33 minutes. He’ll give you a little bit o’ dis and a little bit o’ dat but a lot o’ bit o’ steals!
Jerryd Bayless – 6/1/3 with a three in 24 minutes. Here’s what I told you last Friday in my Add/Drop post: Jerryd Bayless – 29% – He’s very much in the rotation, just don’t expect his big run to continue. You may get dizzy! I hope your head isn’t spinning. I warned you! I still think he can do his thang in 23-27 mpg though. Or thing if you’re not from the South. Or is it south?
Paul Millsap – 18/10/6 with 2 steals. Rumors have him now going to Brooklyn in a three team type deal where he will be reunited with Deron Williams and they will run the tooth pick and sushi roll which they will eat with chop sticks. I can see all of these things happening!
Alec Burks – 13/5/2 with a three and 6 tovs. Way to protect the ball, Alec. Keep streaming anyway. Minutes, y’all!
Jermaine O’Neal – 12/13/4 with a steal and 5 blocks. I’ll throw him in there with the Sam Dalemberts, Brandon Basses and Tyler Zellers of the world. You know, 5-6 boards and a block or two. If that floats your boat then float away! Or stay on dry land if you’d like. I’m perfectly fine with that too.
Michael Beasley – 18/5/1 with a block and a three in 33 minutes. It looks to me like he’s going to get a clear chance to prove he’s really not that good to another new coach. By my quick count he’s on his 4th coach so he’s got 5 more to go after this! Maybe he’ll prove me wrong. Prove me wrong, B-Easy! I really want you to.
Jared Dudley – 10/5/2 with 2 steals in 26 minutes. Here’s what I told you last week when I told you what I told you the week before: Jared Dudley – 0/3/2 in 17 minutes. Here’s what I told you last Friday when I had Jared on the wrong side of my Add/Drop post: Jared Dudley – 69% – More of a continued monitor situation. As I’ve mentioned, I think his best fantasy run is behind him. That huge run led to his ownership skyrocketing. No reason to launch yet but keep an eye on it anyway. I swear I don’t make these predictions, it’s my Magic 8 Ball, he sees into the future. He knows everything! I got him on eBay. Keep an eye on Jared over the next few games. Downward trending, y’all! But you already knew that. If you’re itching to lose him in shallow leagues (assuming you haven’t already!) then I’d consider holding him through the trade deadline to see if his situation changes. If it doesn’t change then feel free to launch for a hot free agent!
Earl Clark – 11/4/1 with 3 steals and a three in 28 minutes. He’s got a sore knee bone so I’m not expecting much on Thursday night. Antwan for threeeeeeeeeeee! Earl should be fine with some rest. Like J.J. Hickson! Let’s hope for the best. Now give me an Amen. Amen.
James Harden – 27 points! Yay. 7 rebounds! Yay! 5 assists! Yay! 3 steals! Yay. 2 threes. Yay 11-11 FT! Yay. 5 tovs! Boo. 7-22 FG! Boooo. Turned ankle! Ugh! I think he’ll play tonight anyway, just a hunch. It’s just a turned ankle!, said Kobe Bryant.
Chandler Parsons – 21/8/9 with a steal, block and 3 threes. I remember way, way, way back on November 2 when I told you this in my Add/Drop post: Chandler Parsons – 25% – The second best Chandler since Friends. Though I’m still annoyed he ended up marrying Monica. Too convenient! Now he’s 80% owned and that, my friends, is how you win leagues! Get out the pun police, we’ve got a violation!
Toney Douglas – DNP – CD. I’m blurbing about him today because he should be streamed tonight if Jimmy Beard actually does sit out. We straight, Skippy? That’s your new (old) name. Also, give Carlos Delfino a look-gander as a streamer in this scenario.
Harrison Barnes – 7/2/1 with a block in 27 minutes. Hey, Harrison, you’re no Chandler (Parsons), now pass the Grey Poupon!
Hey, if you haven’t already, don’t forget to play me heads up for free and win $5 over at DraftDay.com. It’s free with no strings attached. If you win you can take your $5 and go home no questions asked. Or you can take that $5 and play again to win even more money at DraftDay! You’ll be playing with house money! There really is no better way to introduce yourself to playing daily fantasy sports so give it a shot! Oh, and if you get addicted to playing daily fantasy sports, we have a support group for you. It’s called the Comments.